From time to time I get email updates from a good friend in California filling me in on how his re-entry to California civilization is going. I must admit that I have been living overseas in Asia for so long now that I am not sure I could go back. It is not for the obvious reasons but it is a much bigger conundrum, I am just used to being an expat in Asia and going home is just too boring. I miss my family tons but not much else. It is interesting to hear how people who have lived or stayed in Asia for a while deal with going home but this is the first time anyone as ever used Maslow’s hierarchy of needs to explain how they were doing.
The basic premise is this:
Maslow’s theory contended that as humans meet ‘basic needs’, they seek to satisfy successively ‘higher needs’ that occupy a set hierarchy.
Wait - nightlife update:
Had to show some FOBs around last night and we started out in Nana. First up was Rainbow 4. As always, full of girls but my general feeling is the overall quality is down as compared to a few months ago. I think the hotter of the RB girls are working in 1 and 2 these days with a few sprinkled around 3.
From RB 4 we moved to Cascade. All FOBs must see a ladyboy bar once in their lives. Nothing beats a non-shy ladyboy rubbing a newbie’s head in her big fake boobs for all to see. Priceless. I think he was getting excited.
From Cascade we popped downstairs to check out Playskool. Hardly any girls on the stage and the place was just not pumping at all. We passed.
Then we went into Rainbow 1 and stayed. It was packed with girls, the music was good and the vibe called for a few drinks. The FOBs were in awe of the flesh and were amazed at the amount of hotties.
We then bailed on Nana and stopped by Glow on Soi 23. It was actually packed. Must be the ladies night but the crowd was good, the music was superb and there were plenty of girls mulling around. Ladies night is every Thursday night. All ladies get in free and get one drink. Not a bad deal and seems to be getting better by the week. I would go around 10:30 or later.
The FOBs headed back to their hotel and we carried on to Cowboy. I headed straight for Long Gun and was pleasantly surprised to see the 4 girl rock & roll show that was completely nude for 2 songs. 2 LG girls and 2 Rawhide girls. All hot. After the show I left with the RH girl to get her a drink in RH. RH was not bad either - all nude. Great stuff.
Overall though - Cowboy and Nana were both fairly quiet. As I was walking home I got a call from one of my member club contacts who invited me to The Tunnel club. Tunnel was packed. They wanted 300 baht for entry but the music was awesome and the place was really heaving. I think in the last 2 weeks the Tunnel has really come back and is attracting freelancers, girls after work and some member club girls looking to party. All good!
update over -
Here is a link to the image showing Maslow’s pyramid so you can bask in the full effect if it before we dive in deeper. The first level in the pyramid is about Physiological needs:
The physiological needs of the organism, those enabling homeostasis, take first precedence. These consist mainly of:
- Eating
- Drinking
- Sleeping
- Sex
- If some needs are not fulfilled, a human’s physiological needs take the highest priority. Physiological needs can control thoughts and behaviours, and can cause people to feel sickness, pain, and discomfort.
Nice concise list. I would argue that Bangkok is one of the cheapest cities around in which to satisfy the first level. I also don’t think the quality is lacking either. Meaning cheap street food is still quite good. Drinking can be pretty affordable here for the most part but sometime people complain about spending too much on drinking because Bangkok is one of those cities that makes it to easy to go out every night. I lived in a 4500 baht a month apartment for almost a year - was not bad at all. My roach invested pad in San Francisco on Turk street cost me a lot more and was probably more dangerous as well. Sex - well I am not going to get into a big debate here but I think it is cheaper to get laid on a regular basis in Bangkok even if this means regular dating or a steady girlfriend. Let alone the P4P scene.
So allowing oneself to easily deal with the first level should enable climbing up the pyramid much easier than in other parts of the world. Safety is pretty well met in Thailand so that is not an issue. Then we get into love and belonging which I think can be met by having some good friends and if one so desires by having a girlfriend. All pretty doable here. The next levels are esteem and self-actualization which really no one can do for you and is not all together environment related.
So my big theory here - unless one completely falls off the rails, is that one can focus more easily on other things in life that are interesting or self-fulfilling instead of focusing on how to get by and how to get laid. As a caveat I will say that sometimes it takes time to get settled in places like Bangkok since the desire for partying or sarging can keep you from being productive. So the total opposite effect could happen where one only seems to be able to eat, drink, party and find girls thus leaving no time for anything productive but I think it can be controlled. Further to this I am sure many people know of friends or acquaintances who have fallen off the rails. They have lost it due to overindulging on all cylinders but if one has some goals I think that could be avoided.
Maybe I digress but when I hear about my single friends at home there is almost an innate focus on level 1 to the point they are unhappy with life. Or, the real over-achievers, tend to give up on sex, love and relationships and turn into proper workaholics. Neither one is particularly appealing. One of my old habits while working in Hong Kong was to almost never go out, work all the time and save going out for when I came to Thailand.
Of course in this discussion I have not touched on things like employment, careers and so on since this is different for everyone. I came to Thailand to try and re-invent myself and work on things that I never had the time for before so my goals in Thailand may be different than other people but I do think that it is an amazing place to experience. Maslow was on to something.
Anyway. Back to the real world. More member club research, new frontiers for bar hopping and why I am going without but that is a much longer story. On the Biz 101 side - we might soon discuss how to keep your Thai staff from banging their co-workers. Another chapter I did not find in - How to run a bar in Bangkok for Dummies.
Move along - nothing to see here.
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hmmmm, Smitty, i’m not sure Abe meant “drinking booze” when he said “drinking”.
View all comments by rbp
Interesting, Smitty.
I lived in Bkk for four years around the turn of the century and return every once in a while (not as often as I would like)primarily to enjoy variety in satisfying the more basic needs. I do not think I could live there again as the “higher” needs, which seem to become more important as I get older, are actually easier to satisfy elsewhere.
I wonder if this explains a dichotomy I see amongst Farang in LoS into younger guys who are less interested in the higher needs simply because they have the advantage of being young and irresponsible, and that group of older guys who cannot satisfy the lower needs elsewhere.
Clearly, there are others (including yourselves, of course, grovel, grovel (never know when may need a cheap beer)) who do not fit into either camp.
Shit, this is a bit philosophical for a Bangkok nightlife blog!!
View all comments by Martin
RBP - agreed. I did not mean so much the literal sense of it but they fact the most single males with disposable incomes will spend a certain amount of their money going out. Alcoholic consumption or not.
Martin - We like to think that we can broaden the topics past just the bar life given there is more to life than just the bar life.
Good points though!
I agree with you on the higher needs since that is the issue for many an expat living abroad. Bangkok or elsewhere.
View all comments by smitty
higher needs, if that’s what you want to call them, will probably come into play sooner or later. if not by the time you hit 30, then most likely when you are 40. if not, then be very afraid. nothing is more pathetic than seeing an aging farang at a bar who insists on enlightening you on his various experiences over the past quarter century.
View all comments by LeftofCenter
LOC - I am not sure what that means really. There is this assumption that I cannot have it all in Bangkok? I disagree. I think I can. I have goals, desires and seem to work on them while at the same time I have an amazing nightlife that I think is consistent with what people my age are doing. Now maybe some people may age have a goal to get married and have kids but that is a choice.
I also don’t think that the only life in Thailand is a bar. I am entrepreneur choosing to ply my trade in Bangkok.
The point that for sure can be made though is that some people probably have a tendency to lose it here and forget that there is more to life than a beer bottle.
View all comments by smitty
higher needs….you mean like being able to watch the US version of Sportscenter rather than the pathetic HK version ?
That’s all I need !
View all comments by bo
I should elaborate I guess:
Eating..it’s so eay in Thailand..cheap food on every corner.
Drinking..well..my ‘drinking’ days are well behind me. I’m not scared of a can or two depending on the company I keep, but it’s not a big deal anymore
Sleeping…overrated.
Sex…like eating, it’s easy to satisfy that need.
One ‘need’ that you may not think about is conversation that goes beyond pidgen. You would not believe how starved you get for that. To be able to talk about politics, baseball, that last episode of The Sopranos with someone who ‘gets it’.
View all comments by bo
For me it would be some Krispy Kremes, no import taxes on REAL motorcycles and full fledged HBO but I digress…
View all comments by smitty
Sleeping overrated? Is that possible?
And the last episode of The Sopranos sucked.
View all comments by Jack Dawson
It is overrated - cuts into my partying time.
You mean the very last episode or the last season? It was tough watching that ending. I needed more but I was always impressed with the lack of closure as well. Tough call!
View all comments by smitty
Smitty - Im not sure what your personal situation is, but now I’m not sure what your response really means. What is ‘having it all’ mean to you? Is it satisfying the first level needs? If so, you seem to have done that. If you are under 30 or maybe still under 40, then you probably are ‘having it all’. I’m just saying that people who stay in Thailand more than a few years and continue to have it all eventually get bored and look for something with more meaning (a higher goal?) or else continue on that path and become one of the pathetic old farangs just looking for a victim to share his old war stories with in exchange for a beer or two.
View all comments by LeftofCenter
Meaning I don’t understand why I cannot get to all levels of the pyramid while living in Thailand? There is always this assumption that people stay here for only one thing and thus does not allow them to accomplish anything else. I think people can get bored for any various of reasons including stuff related to careers or self-fulfillment. I am going to try and have my cake and eat it too while staying in Thailand.
Once again - life in Thailand is not only about the bars…
View all comments by smitty
Smitty,
I think the issue is that higher needs usually require working at and in LoS it is so easy to have a great time satisfying the more basic needs that many people do not make the effort. Indeed, in many ways it is an extension of the instant gratification culture that now pervades the West. However, if you chose to make the effort, there is no doubt you can get those higher needs satisfied in Thailand.
View all comments by Martin
I am guilty of probably not explaining myself all that well.
my point was that is it is so easy to deal with level one here that I feel like I have more time in my life to get to the other levels. I think the other levels are different for each person. Some people want marriage and kids- others want money. others want to invent something. I am sure not many share this view of the world but having come from the toiling life of western success I am enjoying the way the other half of the world chooses to live.
I feel sorry for these people here:
http://tinyurl.com/2z4kyp
They seem to have missed what life is about to some extent
http://tinyurl.com/2z4kyp
View all comments by smitty
Firing on all cylinders all the time is exactly where I went wrong this last time, but can’t cry over split milk I loved it all and learnt so much. My only regret is not seeing as much of the day time stuff. Lots more balance next time.
View all comments by Young Royal
bbb extra long comment…
http://www.bangkokbadboy.com/the-mens-liberation-army.html
View all comments by smitty