Related posts from Werewolf:
http://www.2thebigmango.com/reader-submissions/getting-an-hiv-test-in-sukhumvit/
http://www.2thebigmango.com/reader-submissions/is-it-like-playing-russian-roulette-by-werewolf/
With Werewolfs recent post I thought it would be appropriate to shed some light on some of the more common and less dreaded STD’s. Well not so much on the STD’s themselves, but testing, specifically stateside testing. When I first moved to Bangkok for work a few years ago my “firm” had a driver attached to my particular department. He was a Thai guy and knew all the angles, if you needed something he could get it. He was a shady fellow but could be relied upon to help you out if you needed any assistance. We will call him Khun Shady.
Upon joining my new firm I was quickly run down some of the do’s and don’ts, places to hangout, places to avoid and what to happen when I got an STD, not if, but when. My peers exact words were “when you get an STD, because you will if you go with a bar girl, you need to see Khun Shady. Every one of us at the company that go with bar girls have had an STD at one time or another, make sure you wrap it up, but sometimes the condom breaks.” My friend relayed a story to me that Khun Shady had taken him to a clinic so he could get his bore punched on one occasion. He also told me Khun Shady insisted on seeing his package before he took my friend to the Doc. Shady also insisted on being in the Doctors office while my friend had his bore punched. Now my friend is not a small guy, and in our profession we have certain skillets that allow us to inflict a great deal of pain on others, but nevertheless my friend was in a pinch and he conceded to Khun Shady’s requirement. FYI, Khun Shady was married with kids, but I guess that doesn’t mean anything.
Well true to my friends prediction, I got the old drip within months of being in Bangkok. I called Khun Shady and said “I need to go to the clinic, I’ll be off work at such a such time, have the car ready”, “Ok, Khun Quagmire” I depart work and Shady is waiting for me. He said “Khun Quagmire, let’s go in the bathroom, let me see.” “Shady, you’re not looking at my fucking dick, lets go!”, Shady replied, “Quagmire, I need to see before I take you.” At this point I threatened Shady with physical violence, and low and behold we were on our way to the clinic without him checking out my package.
We arrived at a small clinic on a side stree near Patpong. This was a place where the bar girls went to get tested/treated, this was apparent as there were a few bar girls present. The Doc knew the routine, no farangs came to this clinic except when escorted by Shady, and of course always for the same thing. So the Doctor takes me in to his office and Shady tries to follow, I’m about to get my bore punched and this perv is trying to go in and get a peak. Well I again had to resort to the threat of physical violence, and again Shady relented and stayed in the waiting room.
The Doc proceeds to punch the bore and runs the Q-tip on a slide and views the contents under a microscope. Within seconds the Doc declares that I have an “NGU”. I thought it would take time to diagnose, and perhaps a petri dish would be involved, but nope. I’m a bit skeptical but my peers at my company had been using this guy for years and swore by him. So I decide to just take the Doc’s advice. He gives me a baggie of pills and directions and I’m off, It might have cost 500 Baht, but I can’t remember, this was years ago.
I proceed with the drug regimen the Doc laid out and within days the drip disappeared and I was back at Cowboy, Nana and Patpong being Quagmire, Giggidy Giggidy! Within months of my treatment I was able to refer one of the new guys at our company to the same health care provider via Khun Shady. We were working late one night and my friend said “Man, I think I have a kidney stone or something, it’s like I’m pissing razor blades!” I told him “Motherfucker, you got the clap or something, you wish you had kidney stones bitch!” He was at a loss for what to do and was bashful. I told him to tell Shady and he would ensure he was patched up. I also told him there was no need to show Shady his package, just threaten him with violence. I stressed he needed to take care of the problem ASAP before it snowballed and potentially got worse. Well a few days later I asked if he got patched up and he told me had not.
He was obviously embarrassed despite the fact that I reassured him it happened to just about everyone. I immediately called Shady and after work that day my friend went with him. Apparently the Doc gave him a double dose of Penicillin in the ass, within days he was out whore-mongering again.
A lot of people bitch about Thailand, working with Thai’s, the Sanuk attitude, the corruption, the inefficiency etc. There is however something to be said for the ease of medical treatment, as well as the affordable and easy access to what would be prescription drugs in America. I’m not sure how other countries operate, but in America most of the really useful drugs are by Doctor prescription only, and they are ridiculously priced. For all of Thailand’s shortcomings you have to give them credit for their open minded attitude in regards to what would be prescription drugs in some countries.
Now for those that have dealt with American Doctors and Clinics you will still find questionable service, and poor bedside manner that some will complain about in Thailand. The only difference is you’re paying a whole hell of a lot more for bad service in the states. Then there is the whole case of anonymity/privacy/confidentiality when it comes to STD’s in the States. Let’s go ahead an examine that and perhaps open a few eyes.
Now, I was always under the naive impression that there was a Doctor Patient Confidentiality that could not be breached. Meaning that if I was diagnosed with say an STD it would stay between me and the old Doc. I was soon to be rudely awoken. Confidentiality means something completely different to Government and the individual citizen.
At the time I had a spouse, but being Quagmire I always wanted more. I chatted up this hot half hispanic, half white girl that was 21, I was a few years older. Now don’t get me wrong, I’ll take an Asian over any race any day of the week and twice on sunday, but this was in America, so beggers can’t be chooser right. This chic was smoking, easily an 8 out of 10, and a stone cold freak! We had hooked up a couple times, wearing a hat each time, but on our last meetup I went sans the hat and right into the action.
Fast forward a few weeks later, I’m preparing to take a piss and look down and see a discharge, “What the fuck is that, oh shit.” Well the misses is back home for awhile, plus I wasn’t intimate with her in between the time I hooked up with this little latina cutie so there was no threat to her. I thought I’ll be able to take care this on the downlow. I make an appointment at a local clinc, get tested and guess what, Chlamydia. Well I get a prescription for some Zithromax, at about $65 U.S., that’s for one fucking pill! Take the pill and within days the symptoms subside, I’m in the free and clear, right?
About two weeks after I get diagnosed/treated I get a call from some woman from the CDC that wants to know who I contracted the STD from, the circumstances involved, where at, everything. I’m thinking what the fuck! Doctor Patient Confidentiality right? Wrong, you get “confidential” screening for common STD’s, meaning if you test positive the Doctor forwards your name and contact info up the Center for Disease Control (CDC). The CDC then calls you to ask questions, apparently under the guise of preventing the further transmission of said STD. Now here’s the kicker, if you want to go in for an HIV test it’s “Anonymous” meaning you can go to clinics without surrendering any information. You get a number in return with your order number or some code and just call in to find out the result. I called around to ask several clinics if “Anonymous” STD testing was available and pressed the issue to see what happened if someone tested positive and they told me that their name was forwarded to the CDC, and that this was standard policy at just about any clinic in the country. I of course found this out after the fact.
So here’s the best part. About a week after I get a call guess who gets a call, the misses. It’s a voicemail, with a vague message ‘This is so and so, we need you to give us a call back at xxx-xxx-xxxx’ from this time to this time. The misses lets me hear the voicemail and I’m puzzled, it’s after hours so she doesn’t call. I can sense something is afoot so I remember the number and google it, low and behold it’s the god damn CDC! The CDC looked up my information and found that I had a misses!
Well I’m not completely ignorant, I know what this is all about, so time to face the music. I divulge the dirt, and isn’t pretty. The CDC of course called back and urged the misses to get tested and told her she may have been exposed to Chlamydia and other STD’s. So there was some salt on the wound. Lovely.
That was quite the eye opening experience for me. So in the States Doctor Patient confidentiality really doesn’t exist in regards to STD’s. Unless it’s something minor like HIV/AIDS, what the fuck! Is it like this in other countries? Or is America the only ones that are as fucked up as this? Now please spare me your moral judgments, I wrote the previous in order to enlighten others that may be as ignorant as I once was.
I guess the moral moral of the story is wrap it up. But even that is not fullproof. And honestly, how many of us that visit Lolita’s have told the girl to go get a hat for the Jimmy? I’d say it would be a safe bet that few to none. And yes, for those that don’t know you can get an STD from getting a BBJ, it’s unlikely, but possible. I would recommend those coming back from holiday in our beloved Thailand to get tested while in Thailand, but even that is no guarantee, as certain STD’s symptoms might not show up for up to a month or longer. It’s really not that embarrassing in Thailand to get tested, and you can expect complete anonymity at some places.
At a clinic on Soi 4 there’s a file on a “Glenn Quagmire.” Another alternative would be to research the treatment for STD’s, pharmacy’s abound in Bangkok, and I’ll leave it that. Me personally, for the curable STD’s I know what’s needed to remedy them so I hit up a pharmacy before departure and take a hit immediately upon returning home or prior to departure. (Disclaimer) You however should seek the professional guidance of a trained and certified healthcare provider.
Hopes this helps and enlightens some.
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Yup, gonnorhea can infect the throat and I got a nice dose of The Clap off a little friend in NEP via a BBJ. The symptoms first became obvious in the middle of a 17 hour flight to NYC. Figured I’d get it looked at there but certainly didn’t want to rock up to some 5th Avenue GP and pay $600 to have my dick swabbed.
Went to a free STD clinic in Chelsea, sat around for an hour and was seen by a surprisingly practical young doc who took one look, said “yeah, that’s The Clap” and gave me a handful of antibiotics gratis. He also swabbed and said I could call back a few days later to find out just how many other STDs I had. Fortunately, my uncomfortable unmentionable had cleared up by the time I returned to the family in Bangkok.
Now I’ve boned up on self-medication and keep a supply of doxycycline, ciprofloxacin (Cipro) and azithromycin (Zithromax) hidden away at home. The Cipro will also come in useful if there’s an anthrax attack. Or if I ever eat the Big Mango Muffin.
View all comments by KamnanT
quag - great post!
KT -
what STD goes with which drug?
doxycycline =
ciprofloxacin (Cipro) =
azithromycin (Zithromax) =
View all comments by sideshowBOB
Awesome post,
As sad as it is, yes doctor patient confidentiality has changed somewhat in recent years. If you recall there was a form that almost everyone has to sign that is required before a stateside doc can treat a patient. I’m betting that within this form is the right to release your info to the CDC (or probably any other federal, state, municipal, county, dog catching, etc. agency).
A Brave new world
View all comments by TheSoiLawyer
@ Guagmire - I’m aware that contact tracing is standard procedure in the UK, but confidentiality is respected (or at least - it was still a few years back). In fact, in GU clinics it’s tighter than almost any other clinical setting there. So they ask you directly for the names of your contacts usually within the last month and then follow them up only if they are given. And I think this is respected, because I’ve sat in on a discussion where a lot of handwringing was going on about a guy who was HIV +ve who was know to be having unsafe sex and the dilemma was that the clinic staff felt completely powerless to do anything. Also, they’re actually not allowed to give the contact YOUR name, but of course in some cases there will only one possibility (unless the STD has a very long incubation period, which can muddy the water since the contact may have been years ago, so it depends if your relationship is a long or short one).
Basically one perspective on ‘public health’ which may be the US view, is that it’s about putting the interests of the community above those of the individual and the reality is that contact tracing is an effective control measure. But of course all the baggage attached to having such a shameful disease makes it a minefield.
@ Sideshow Bob - azithromycin is good for pretty much everthing bacterial inc’ gonorrhoea, NSU / NGU, chlamydia, even syphilis if I’m not mistaken - and as above, it has the convenience of coming as a single mega-dose for most of these bugs. But it is expensive. If you want the details, you can just buy a packet and read the product info inside.
For BBJ, you can certainly get STDs, but the much greater risk is to the girl if you have one - which I imagine is usually not considered much
Also, allowing antibiotics over the counter is great for the individual, but a public health nightmare because of what happens with resistance if they are used inapproriately on a large scale. I’m actually surprised it’s allowed in Thailand when they are so strict about some other drugs - but I guess it may be due to pressure from the pharmaceutical companies infuencing policy
View all comments by K1ndofblue
I don’t want to get all moral here but self-medicating is a terrible idea. Sure, you can take the super drugs which are readily available in Thailand but eventually, you may have a false negative ie. the drip and/or pain stops but you still have the infection, infestation, whatever you want to call it. Also, you may mis-diagnose the disease or severity and/or strain in which case, you take the wrong drug or not enough of the drug.
The problem is that the bacteria that cause the disease can develop a resistance to the drugs. The only way to know if you’re truly clean is to be re-tested after taking the drugs.
Given the availability and prices for STD testing, why would you want to gamble? See a reliable doc, get the prescription and get retested to be sure you’re clean.
/soapbox
View all comments by The Asian Badger
Ok. I won’t comment on any morals here, since it’s not my place, but in Denmark confidentiality means confidentiality. If you get a STD only you and the doctor will know. -however, it’s encouraged that you track down your various sexpartners and tell them what’s up so that they can get tested.
View all comments by Linepigen
Zithromax is great for Ghonerria
They charged me 1400+ baht for 4tabs at Bumund…… on Suk soi 3, and a further 800baht for an injection in the arse. You can get 6 tabs for 580 baht at Boots.
I caught ‘The Big G’ after nailing a nana freelancer in the brown. 3 days later I had fluorecent goo seeping out of my Hogs Eye, and it felt like I was pissing chiilisauce. I would rather be circumsized (again) then a repeat of the ghonerria
Be warned, the slutty smiley babe in the white coat behind the counter @ Boots wont be smiling for long. She knows you need the Zith tabs for your snotty cock. Dirty ferang!
View all comments by Young Penfold
SSB - I’m not a medical professional so I advise just googling the various STD’s on the CDC website and that will provide the recommended dosage and specific med for various STD’s. Plus the treatments occasionally change with new drug resistant strains that come into existance.
YP - I know Zithromax will work for Chlamydia, but I’m not really confident it is recommended for Gonorrhea. I’ve down a lot of “googling” and haven’t seen anywhere that recommended Zithromax for Gonorrhea. And this is another reason why I really don’t want to give out specific meds for specific STD’s, conflicting information.
Badger - You’re absolutely right, self medication isn’t the best thing. A friend who is a medical professional told me the exact same thing, and for the exact same reasons you mentioned. Nevertheless as long as these drugs are readily available armchair Doctors will continue to self medicate and diagnose. And yes, the only way to be sure you have knocked everything out is to get retested. I think most that are in Thailand have no aversion to hitting up a clinic to get tested. And most, but not all that are in the P4P seen are probably unattached. Now lets be honest here, there are a lot of tourists or businessmen that are married and currently partaking of the P4P scene in Bkk. Those are the guys that may be more inclined to self diagnose and medicate after returning home or before doing so.
View all comments by Quagmire
Do any of you know the Thai word for chlamydia? It is not listed in my Thai-English dictionary, though gonnerhea and syphilis are.
View all comments by Ling
I also neglected another motivating factor for self medication. Getting your bore punched is not something that most people really enjoy, I personally would rather pop a couple of pills instead of getting the bore punched.
View all comments by Quagmire
My uncle is a heart specialist and told me the scoop years ago about the amount of privacy you have - may as well put you name, number and ailment in the personals section of the newspaper. Insurance companies, labs, law enforcement and other government agencies all get access to your “private” info if you sign those disclosure forms. When I’m paying cash none of that stuff is their business and anyways, they’ve got a phone so I can call them back if I need a follow up.
Not even a dentist gets anything more than my name and address most times I’m so drunk I’m sure I don’t get that right.
View all comments by Bubba
1000mg single dose azithromycin should be good for gonnorrhea & chlamydia, the two most common.
However, this is not assured. Both of these conditions now have multi-antibiotic resistant strains in Asia, a direct result of self medication, incompetent doctors precribing inappropriately and patients not completing full courses of the medication.
View all comments by Combover
Sorry, ignore the last post and I shouldn’t have put it up there anyway. 1000mg may not be the correct dosage for gonnorhea.
http://www.pfizer.com/files/products/uspi_zithromax.pdf
Just goes to show. Don’t self medicate and don’t listen to idiots like me on the internet. See your local clap clinic. They really do know best.
View all comments by Combover
For Thai>English or English>Thai translations a useful website is:
http://www.thai2english.com/
I use it often.
However they didn’t have a translation for Chlamydia, and I even double checked the spelling by googling it. That’s the first time I ever stumped the translator.
It may be that the Thai word is simply the same as the English.
View all comments by Werewolf
They seem to have adopted the English word (คลามีเดีย):
http://www.health.nsw.gov.au/mhcs/publication_pdfs/7105/DOH-7105-THA.pdf
View all comments by Bangkok Bad Boy
I first got a case of the drippy dick years ago in Hong Kong. So I went to my usual doc, a western guy, ex British army, who has been in asia for ages.
He said no problem its just shot of penicilin up your bum.
Fine.
Then he casually asked if I knew who I got it from?
I said from some Flipper freelancer who calls herself Angie and hangs out in Neptunes II.
Ah yes he said. I get a lot of business from her…..
View all comments by MSB
I know an Angie who hangs out in Neps
View all comments by Combover
I had to google the meaning of “bore punched.” You’ll be happy to know that this article is already third in the google results.
View all comments by gavinmac
gmac - thanks
we pride ourselves on the sordid google search terms that send people our way - for example:
testicle torture
girls who pinch boyfriends
chinese dominatrix
st lt pattaya
pattaya beer bars darkside
ladyboy fish
four mod toilet khon kaen video
bangkok nightlife man massage
View all comments by sideshowBOB
I used to have Syph., but it’s Gonn now.
View all comments by Jasser
WW & BBB - Thanks for the links and info.
View all comments by Ling
For Chlamydia
Our local doc always subscribes E-Mycin (Erythromycin Ethyl Succinate) 400mg Tablets.
Take 3 in one hit (regardless of what the label on the script says). Just take them as you leave Thailand and your wife/girlfriend (not that we own any of these) will not get infected. It is much worse if females catch it (google and see).
This is what the some of the medicos suggest that they should do in the Northern Territory to all aboriginals where it is almost epidemic. Overall the Australian Medical Foundation reckon it is the most prevelant STD in Australia and rather than waiting for people to go to doctors with trouble they want to just go through and single dose every one. Don’t think that this idea will be taken to fruition, but it would work.
Cheers
View all comments by 3amigos
Zithromax will have that gooey prick cleared up in no time.
After a visit to Bumungrand, within 2 celibate weeks it came back again just as strong.
I then wolfed down 18 Ziths over the course of the next 24hours, (trawling to 3 seperate Boots to save face) and as if by magic, it was all gone the next day, and was able to piss without crying
View all comments by Young Penfold
YP - Damn, that’s a lot of Zith, hope your liver is alright! I think your logic is a bit off, by going to 3 different boots you let three different people know you needed the “Zith”. I would have just got them all at the same place.
View all comments by Quagmire
Morals??? Quagmire, I won’t judge you. I once banged a smoking hot Vietnamese girl 10 times in 4 days while on a business trip to the east coast. Then went home to my Japanese spouse with a sore dick and a white discharge. Hey a queen of diamonds trumps a queen of hearts any day; I have my priorities straight. U Know?
I thought it was quite odd to drip so quick being the veteran I am; however, I got tested anyway (bore punched; not fun) and much to my surprise I was clear.?.?. Yeah you know it they called the old lady anyway; suggested she get tested just in case and boy did I have to explain this. Luckily she didn’t understand English well; so I was left with the burden of translating the call from the clinic staff. So I let her know the doctor said “I was OK” and that she needed to go in for a routine check because I may have come in contact with a dirty toilet seat. She’s always been suspicious about that.
It is definitely more worry free the way you explain it being in Thailand, however, without that strict control, like let’s say in the States it is hard for the government to do their part in preventing spread of diseases. Let’s face it; the dogs are going to chase the cats. Who’s going to go tell their spouse to get tested especially with divorce laws? Not me, but I guess that is why they have those CDC laws.
K1ndofblu; you said it best about the protection of the masses versus the individual.
View all comments by Xagrin
@ Xagrin. Thanks for the namecheck! The principle of putting the interests of the community over the individual is well established -banning smoking in public places because of the potential impact of passive smoking is one that’s been mentioned on this blog. I’m personally a bit ambivalent about that one (or arguably hypocritical..) because I support it, but also sometimes smoke in places where it’s still allowed - i.e. when I could just go outside. But I think the issue about these kind of policies is getting the balance right - squeezing the greatest benefit without developing into a nanny state… But I’m also interested to know what you guys think about protecting the confidentiality of the HIV guy having unsafe sex. The really awful aspect of it was that there was a strong suspicion he was doing it deliberately as a kind of revenge thing.
View all comments by K1ndofblue
The good old dirty toilet seat excuse. My favorite one.
View all comments by hanuman
going to retell a story I heard second hand but knowing the teller I believe it. Said dude, a dentist, gets back from a trip from asia and realizes he has the clap. he self medicates but then realizes he has slept with his gf upon returning home. founds out his gf is going to dentist for a checkup. call his friend, the dentist of the GF and explains the situation. the friend prescribes the GF the clap medicine but explains it was for some mouth infection.
props.
View all comments by sideshowBOB
Chlamydia - caught that from a blow job given by a sukumvit freelancer.
The bad breath that wouldn’t vanish after a mouthful of Listerine should have given me a heads up.
View all comments by James B