A little pre-weekly grist for you all.
Was listening to one of my favorite podcasts today and came across some chatter about a girl from where I used to live. Sacramento, CA - serious epicenter for Northern California white trash. Sure - some of them where suits but believe me, underneath they are still white trash. I know my own kind. Anyway - it usually is something weird that puts Sacto on the map. This case is no different. FYI - for all you political buffs, Sacto is the capital of California.
Seems some unloved white girl has decided to sell her virginity in an auction. Howard Stern is promoting it and the auction is being handled by the Bunny Ranch in Nevada. More details are to be found here - seems the dirty deed will go down at the Bunny Ranch. So romantic.
I love her intro:
Natalie Dylan is a college girl from Sacramento CA.. Not only does she have a degree in Women’s Studies, she is looking to raise money to continue her education and get her master’s degree in Psychology so she can practice Family Psychology.
She comes to us here at the bunny ranch with a very special gift, Natalie is a virgin and would like to sell this priceless and rare commodity in a very exclusive and private setting.
One time only she will appear at the bunny ranch and give up her virginity to the highest bidder.
Hilarious that her major is women’s studies.
Good to see Sacramento breaking new ground!
She looks like a lady boy.
View all comments by bkk22
No boobs, gobs of makeup, a bit thick, no experience, and you have to put up with her. I bid 1 satang and she has to pay for the condoms and room.
View all comments by pmmp
Pmmp, 1 satang is a bit off of the current bid that is over $300,000 USD. What maniac would pay that much is unknown.
In case anyone is wondering, it’s typically $1,000 USD for a 45 minute round with one of the girls at the ranch. It’s a one shot deal, so if you finish in 10 minutes then you’re shown the door. Looks wise, the gals are the western equivalent of the caliber of gals strolling Beach Road at 2am.
View all comments by Testing
So, can I bid by phone and just have phone sex with her if I come out on top?
View all comments by Werewolf
She’s highly doable but at 300 000 USD that sounds like a Guiness World rip off.
View all comments by SukPsycho
If anyone EVER questions my rational for living in Thailand or I have one bad day here I will pull this post up for a quick read. I hope the so called “winner” never finds Thailand as he will screw up the cost of a short time even more than the Japanese have.
View all comments by billybobbkk
I placed a bid setting conditions whereby i would be allowed to donkey punch and eskimo kiss her. it was rejected, there’s always sutthisan.
View all comments by UnCochinoWetback
Last year some loser put their virgin ring on eBay.
Paying for ‘college’ fees the advert said.
(I didn’t make anywhere near 300k though
)
View all comments by Daywalker
a thousand bucks for a one-shot 45 minute root??? Surely you jest? What do they do? Stuff foie gras and black truffles up your date?
View all comments by rootrat
A couple of moths ago I had a stupor-inducing gel massage at Colonze 2. I just worked out that I could have 4271 of these for the $300000 - one every day for the next 11 years 8 months!
I better get started.
View all comments by Nok Opayop
What in the hell is women’s studies? Is that where they look in a mirror and say I love you too much, over and over? She is a doable item but 2500 baht would be pushing it. A virgin is great when your 14 but how many of you would hire a inexperienced mechanic to work on your BMW.I can hear it now, “is the condom on straight, not too deep, a little to the left, you want me to put it in, do I have to touch it, just pop the cherry, no blow job. no you can’t put it in my ass first, do I have to move”. Thanks but no thanks!!!
View all comments by The Man
One Simple Question: When will “Men’s Studies” ever become standard university curriculum? Men’s Studies 101 would probably be reading this blog.
View all comments by The Soi Lawyer
$300k? Sure, I’d take it, but I’d do her if you gave me $500 as long I didn’t have to go to some skeezy ranch in Nevada.
View all comments by tosh
I think we are all agreed…. if you have access to an airport - why bother…..
View all comments by doctorbond
Most of us have been with a virgin at some point or another.. it has never been the most exciting time to break one in..
No thanks, I’ll be the dude after the 300K guy and give her 1500B LT.
View all comments by GoodLife
I would like to annouce to all my fellows that I’m officially offering myself to the highest bidder. Although I am 50 years-old, I am still a virgin (sort of) but I am willing to take what you have. The only requirement is a minimum of $300k (US) and no kissing and you must wear two rubbers. You also only get 4 minutes, and, regretfully, I will have to time you. I’ll be be in town next week, so please register all offers with the Mango staff (who will get a 10% cut and a free viewing.)
View all comments by Tim Oakland
Imagine if that was your daughter.
View all comments by Mr Right
“Imagine if that was your daughter”
- well, whatever does it for you I suppose.
View all comments by Daywalker
Ohh..yahh..ooh keep talking about my daughter guyssss.. I’m almost done!!!
View all comments by ron
For 300,000 bones, id expect to take her platinum encrusted hymen home, pickled in Crystal champagne.
I wonder how much I could raise if i sold my virginal ‘chocolate teatowel holder’ for online
View all comments by Young Penfold
YP… there are very few (me included) that believe your rusty bullet hole is ‘virginal’.
Wizards sleeve comes to mind.
View all comments by Daywalker
“Eskimo kiss” … that’s where you rub your noses together, right? I’m still working on “donkey punch”.
View all comments by Pants Elk
… oh yeah. And YP has baked more love biscuits in his butt oven than Tom Cruise.
View all comments by Pants Elk
Urban legend tells you the Donkey Punch involves striking a woman at the base of the neck at orgasm.
That’s simply assault and battery.
There’s an article here on what it isn’t, and what it really is. And considering its from a complete woman hater’s site, I think it can be believed.
http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/donkey-punch/
View all comments by Pattaya Ghost
PG - I think it’s during orgasm when having anal sex in particular (hit her at the base of the neck and the sphincter tighens at just the right moment). You can get the same effect in a more PC way by politely asking her to “cough violently” right before you deliver the baby batter - or so i’ve heard.
View all comments by generous sponsor
Fuck that, call up a mate whos preferably trained in brazilian ju-jitsu, and get them to slap a ‘kimura’ strangehold on her as your about to get your jester shoes. While shes unconcious, thieve her purse and shit in her handbag. Profit!
View all comments by Young Penfold
YP…. you’re single right?
View all comments by day walker
DW - your interested right?
View all comments by Young Penfold
an eskimo kiss involves dispensing man juice in the womans mouth then giving her nice long kiss as she sloshes the stuff in her mouth. feel kind of bad that i’m the only one who knows that. makes me feel like a freak.
View all comments by UnCochinoWetback
YP,
Trust me sonny, you couldn’t afford me
View all comments by daywalker
“An eskimo kiss involves dispensing man juice in the womans mouth then giving her nice long kiss as she sloshes the stuff in her mouth.”
I’ve just cancelled my sex tour of Greenland.
View all comments by Nok Opayop
According to Seymore Hirsh, J.F.Kennedy was partial to form of Donkey Punch. Rather than deliver the actual punch, spastic vaginal contractions were elicited with ’simulated’ drowning in a bathtub. You see, Rumsfeld wasn’t the first on this one.
View all comments by fanta
… couldn’t his people just find JFK a real spastic to fuck? What are they paid for up there at the White House?
View all comments by Pants Elk
saltybackdroplets - u should feel funny and u are sick
fanta - I always knew JFK was messed up
View all comments by sideshowBOB
@ PE … “couldn’t his people just find JFK a real spastic to fuck? What”
Ah, memories, memories.
View all comments by fanta
How about we find the sad fucker who wants to pay 300k for the pretend virgin. Give him our suggestions on what to do on their first incounter, and mabe then she might know the true meaning of “women’s studdies”. These things can’t be tought in a text book. We can always start our own Tertairy institution down some Soi called ‘women’s studies’, get some well experienced Bg’s as instructors, have a few guest lectures, mainly viewers of this site and we’ll send the bitches back with a better education. At least the guys back home will thank us for it.
View all comments by The mango muncher
DW: Ah man, “Wizard’s sleeve comes to mind”, I’m still rolling, don’t know where you pulled that one from but I needed that.
View all comments by dogflye
Dogflye et all….
I will be raising my glass to YP’s battered ring piece on Monday the 13th in the Mango. Anyone wanting a free Mango shot need just whisper in my ear (I’ve been inside YP)
I’ll bring lots of cash.
Offer lasts between 8pm-8:05. Incase BBB reads this.
View all comments by Daywalker