Okay, I’ll admit it, last night I had whiskey wiener and couldn’t deliver the wood. My company for the evening was a girl I’ve now seen a few times. I apologized and then passed out as she laid there legs spread wide open.
When I woke up I was awake everywhere and hornier than Oprah watching a McDonald’s cheeseburger being unwrapped. My date had closed her legs from the previous night and laid there with nothing but a thin sheet covering her natural C cups and curvy azz. She was asleep though so it would have to be a subtle and tactical seduction.
I left for the bathroom, bouncing on the mattress a few times “accidentally”, and proceeded to make as much noise as possible in the bathroom. It worked, I heard her shuffling about on the bed and making that “thai girls need 20-25 hours sleep a day” moan. While in the bathroom I washed my privates with “the hose” and gargled with some advanced whitening Crest. I was ready. I bounced back into bed and was greeted with a “I don’t remember how I made it into the bed last night” that I quickly shrugged off and got down to business.
This is where Polymorphous Light Eruption (PLE) comes into play. This beautiful young girl with a cute and tight little body and the aforementioned natural C’s is “apparently” suffering from PLE, which is an acute form of Photosensitivity. If any form of light shines on her body she immediately covers up. The head and below the knees being the only exception.
I’m sure we’ve all been there and have seen these PLE girls contort their bodies and slink out of bed wearing a bed sheet or a towel. Heck, I’ve even seen one sandwich herself between two pillows before heading to the bathroom.
Granted, some women should be covering themselves at all times, my last twenty dates in the States for example, but many of these thai PLE girls are stunning. Sure, they may have some stretch marks from a baby, or a roadmap of motorci scars, but they’re still gorgeous.
This girl from last night had no scars and never had a baby and sported a lovely body that I have seen a few times already, albeit only at night, yet she was still shy. I tried comforting her with the standard “you have a beautiful body, why you shy?” and even some thai “hen jeng bua” (I’ve seen so many times I’m bored) but she wasn’t having it. At nighttime she can’t keep her clothes on but in the daytime, PLE.
I’m sure I’m not alone when I say that one of my favorite parts about shagging a young thai beauty is when they don’t suffer from PLE and walk around butt naked. Those surreal moments that make you glad to be alive with a functioning penis.
The opposite of that is a PLE-Girl. When my PLE-Girl from last night wouldn’t satisfy my morning hunger I quickly had a meeting I had to be at and tossed her out. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t because she didn’t want to have sex it was because she didn’t want to unveil to have sex. I can understand if a girl is too hungover or whatever but PLE I just can’t take. I mean, and I’m sorry to bring this up but I walk around butt naked and it’s not pretty so I can’t understand why a girl half my age and a hundred times my beauty can’t.
I asked her why she is so shy and she didn’t really have an answer. She said sorry and next time she won’t be shy but this was our third date and she was daytime-shy each time. So, to the PLE scrap pile she goes. I know, I know, I’m a shallow ass but fortunately I don’t have to put up with PLE-Girls. The worse are PLE-Girls that work the pole in a GoGo. For crying in a booket, you’re practically naked in front of the whole club but at home you cover up? If anybody has any suggestions for curing PLE or reasons why the gorgeous one’s are so shy I would love to hear them. In the meantime, I’ve just added this to my list of questions I ask before taking a girl home…“I’ll take you home but only if you stay naked the whole time. Are you okay with that?”. Problem solved. 
Scene Update
Everything pretty dry tonight for sure. Spice Club on Suk Soi 11 closed at 2am last night and the cop working the door said Spicy was closed too. He lied. Spicy was open and rammed. I heard Boss, same owner, was also open. Tonight, Spice is closed for sure, not sure on Spicy but one guy outside said it was closing as well. The Duke of Wellington is open until 6pm and then closed until Monday. This seems to be the case for some other pubs as well but some may stay open to serve food and show the Football. Patpong II is your best bet if you are looking for bars serving and showing the Football. They seem to be immune to all closure. Very fair.
Quote worth repeating: Was having a few beers with the retired Bangkok Bad Boy last night and he had just got paid and had a wad of 1000’s in his pocket. He showed me the wad and said “I’m blowing this all on whores”. The Bad Boy lives! Best of luck in the upcoming venture BBB.
Lastly, tinsil in the hair has officially jumped the shark. I saw a long time nana bar girl who’s pushing 40 with bits of tinsil in her hair. Hopefully the tinsil trend will die after xmas. We’ll see.
(author’s note: I know that the shy condition I describe above is not really PLE but I couldn’t find a better medical term for describing it. Please share if there is one)
-pmmp
pmmp…
Try not walking around “butt naked” infront of them. The hot chick probably didn’t want to make you feel more ashamed?
The poor girl would have felt embarrassed standing there in all her glory whilst pmmp (or should that be perv?) stands there with his desheveled body riddled with parasites, warts and rashes?!
View all comments by Daywalker
I must say - I need that little stroll around the house with the tg naked. It is half of the event for me. So the covering up has to go.
Peeps are saying 7/1 will be open tonight an serving but only until 12.
Cowboy had a hard stop last night at 1:50 with tightie boys in brown cruising the soi with lights on to really drive the point home.
Memeber clubs closed tonight but I think all the other areas open but not serving. Strange times.
View all comments by smitty
dw: at least I keep it butt naked in the privicy (English spelling) of my home. Did we forget an Omni Hotel party and an Afterskool on Cowboy romp where a certain daywalker turned the naughty boy corner into the nakedenglishguy standing on a barstool corner for the world to see, even though there wasn’t much to see? The Afterskool girls have seen quite a bit but are still attending counseling for that one.
View all comments by pmmp
Tinsel hair also seen in the receding locks of a swarthy and very male motorcycle-taxi driver a while back. Not a good look.
View all comments by TAFKABBB
pmmp: wasn’t me.
View all comments by Daywalker
@pmmp: Instead of that free beer and for a limited time only, there’s a pube tinseling option with Akane Chitlom’s S2 course. (7 strand limit)
View all comments by thongsuk
Who cares what they’re wearing when they get OUT of bed?
View all comments by Jack Dawson
JD: The same people who munch the girls out and make them orgasm.
No doubt ‘holding’ them will be added to the list of ‘treat a tart like a queen’?!
The other week, I was a little under the weather with my own version of the ’squirts’. Plus a little vomit to add to the color.
Anyway…. my girl called up saying she wanted to see me. I explained that I was in no fit state and that I might end up vomiting on her, or failing that, shit myself.
Her response was…. “Don’t worry, I’ll pretend I am Japanese”
I don’t see her anymore.
View all comments by Daywalker
Me, I’m grateful that the toothless old slappers I wake up next to stay wrapped up - in fact, I’ve been known to throw a rug over their sagging, sore-infested bodies. What seems beautiful at 4 am standing under the BTS steps undergoes a magical (and hideous) transformation in the cruel light of day. Sunlight, however, turns me into a young George Clooney in a reversal of this alchemy, a cruelly ironic change from the old Charles Laughton in Fat Elvis disco mode I resembled the night before as I prowled the streets in search of nubile victims to sacrifice on the altar of my deranged lust.
Oops - here’s me bus …
View all comments by Pants Elk
@Daywalker, did you look under the pile of shit and vomit next to your bed?
View all comments by hanuman
“pile of shit and vomit next to your bed”?
Hey… you can’t refer to my wife as that?!
View all comments by Day Walker
Yo Pants: “What seems beautiful at 4 am standing under the BTS steps undergoes a magical (and hideous) transformation in the cruel light of day.”
8:30 am shadow? the smeared lipstick? miss-aligned implants? amaturish hair-plug re-forestation?, that mezzo-tenor “sawatdii ton chao - tua eng k a-a-a-a-a-a-h” . . . . . eeeeeeeeuw
View all comments by thongsuk
shit. u guys are killing me.
I can almost picture it all exactly - something I have never experienced but what the swede was always trying to convey.
brilliant.
View all comments by smitty
“8:30 am shadow? the smeared lipstick? miss-aligned implants? amaturish hair-plug re-forestation?, that mezzo-tenor “sawatdii ton chao - tua eng k a-a-a-a-a-a-h” . . . . . eeeeeeeeuw”
Yeah. All tha. And that’s just me. You should have seen her.
View all comments by Pants Elk
“8:30 am shadow? the smeared lipstick? miss-aligned implants? amaturish hair-plug re-forestation?, that mezzo-tenor “sawatdii ton chao - tua eng k a-a-a-a-a-a-h” . . . . . eeeeeeeeuw”
Did you get HIS number? I have cash waiting
View all comments by Penfold
penfold…. my number is ..08907….
View all comments by Day Walker
Let’s not forget the tummy stubble and the heron’s legs.
View all comments by Pants Elk
“Did we forget an Omni Hotel party and an Afterskool on Cowboy romp”
Yes I seem to remember a chap at the Onmi Hotel Party sitting on a couch in all his little glory.. high tea at noon?
ooh if that night didnt burn my eyes, i thought he was going to get on the Bar and start dancing in Afterschool..
This is a recurring theam huh DW…
I will send ya my shrink bills.. BASTARD.
View all comments by GoodLife
Goodwife:
You loved it.
View all comments by Daywalker
Just ambling around the site - which I’m new to - in preparation for a 2-week visit to LOS (see smitty, I catch on quickly!)and came across this entry.
Pants Elk’s Dec 23rd comment is magic! It took me about 2 minutes to read, through tears of laughter.
View all comments by redstar
I too feel a little bit shy. But when we get going I cannot remember where my pants were, nor do I care!!
If you satisfy me (by hand or cock or tongue) I will show you anything you like!
P.s. What a lot of unromantic cynical men read your post!
Love S xxx
View all comments by Susie
Susie: Cynical comes with the territory. Btw, are you a man? Sounds like it. Anyway, if you are a woman, I like your attitude once things get going. Before that though you said you are also shy. Why? There are reasons to be shy like a big fat ass but my point in this post is that the girl I was with is gorgeous so it was a huge turnoff that she was shy.
If you do have a big fat ass and don’t want to be shy then work it off. Jog…better yet run…long distances. Run that shyness right off your ass. Men don’t like fat asses. Is that romantic enough for you?
View all comments by pmmp
Susie baby i used to be a personal trainer
Ill have the cottage cheese off your rump in double time
Call me
View all comments by Young Penfold