The FARANG Speaks 2 Much

As I have stated before - running a beer bar or go go is tough work since one is always looking for new girls and trying to hold on to the girls that are already employing. It is a never ending battle. I was asked today why a bar charges a customer if they want to take the girl from the bar. I was thinking about it for a minute and decided that their is a lifetime bar for two reasons. 1. To get the customer to think about it before doing it. Money is the only thing that usually makes someone think before they leap. Have to share some stories later as to why this is important. 2. Finding good girls is hard. Keeping them is harder. If I am going to lose them then I need to recoup some of my investment. So back to the premise. Recruiting is an ongoing project. So on my nights off sometimes I head out looking for new girls. Patpong happened to be my venue of choice since there are some freelancers floating around and some pretty lame go go bars as well.

I won’t get into where and how I recruit since that is a trade secret. Actually I just don’t want to get my ass kicked so I will leave it at that. Anyway after doing some "due" diligence I decided to check out some bars in Patpong. First u have to get through all the touts telling u to come see the sex shows. Just pass on by. The girls doing the shows are not cute and usually look unhappy. The people running the bar will rip u off by overcharging for the beers and making u wait a long time to see a show. I honestly cannot suggest one bar to go to if u want to see shows like that since I think they are all horrible.

The normal go go bars just do not seem to have a lot of cuties in them but I am sure if u check out each bar u might find a cutie or two but nothing in my mind like Nana or Cowboy. That being said I happened to walk by Club Electric Blue and was seeing a few hotties that we starting to make me change my mind. My friends had been telling me for a few weeks that Club Electric Blue was the place to be in Patpong. Recruiting over. Blog research beginning. Tough life.

I took my seat in one of the back booths so I could get a commanding view of the go go. Standard go go layout but unlike most of the Patpong joints the music was pretty good and the girls were actually shaking their tail. I was liking it. Bought myself and my 18 yo service girl a drink since I needed to ask some questions about the place and I liked speaking Thai with her. She was a cutie by the way and due to her size and amazing smile I was doubting her age but she swore she was 18.

I started to take the place in and brought over one of the dancers with exceptional large boobs. Yes - she confirmed they were not real. Okay. One drink and some conversation for kicks but this is when it all started to unravel and reminded me of why I hate Patpong. With the one drink I ordered the Mamasan came over and asked me if I wanted to pay bar and I said no. I also told her that if she bugged me again I was going to leave. She left and I ordered the service girl another drink and looked for some more prey.

Spotted another specimen with large boobs and called her over. She confirmed they were real. I ordered her a drink. Now it was service girl, big boob b and me. Drinking. Was getting buzzed but coherent. I happened to check out my bill, one of those computer printed bills that shows u a running tally, and noticed I was being charged for a pack of smokes. Marb lights. I don’t smoke. The service girl took the bill and came back with the mamasan. The mamasan stated that one of my girls had ordered them. What? She pointed to big boobs a in the corner smoking away on some Marb lights. I said she was not "my" girl, I did not tell her she could put smokes on my bill and told her to take it off my bill. She said she couldn’t. She said only a manager can remove things from my bill. Go find a manager then. She said the manager was out. This is what I refer to as the inmates running the asylum. Never let your bar be without a Farang manager. Why? Your customers are the Farangs - not Thais and the Thais left without supervision don’t know how to take care of your customers. Thailand Bar 101, page 1, paragraph 1. So we sat there and decided that one way to deal with it was to bring me a free drink since it was about the same price as the smokes. I was okay with it. She said would it be okay if I ordered one more drink and with that drink she would bring me a free one. I said okay.

Cute, supercute, service girl returns with 2 drinks. Cool. I look at the bill for kicks. Smokes still there, expected that, but there were 2 drinks added to my bill. They just don’t get it. Even service girl was starting to feel bad knowing that the bartender and the mamasan were obviously trying to screw me at this point. This is why I hate Patpong. They treat everyone like a tourist and expect they can get away with it. I feel bad for the tourists since I don’t think tourists or locals should be treated this way. She swore to me the next drink would be free. So I decided to chill and let it play out while I talked to big boob b. I told her I wanted to pay bar and go clubbing.

Keep it mind it was already 12:30 pm. Late. Meaning I was probably her best chance at a bar fine at this point and there was not much time left for clubbing. She said okay and asked if I would be paying her any money since I was not planning on taking her home. I said I would give her something. She said how much? I said maybe 500 baht if she was cool. Keep in mind I had already bought her some lady drinks and was offering to get her into the club and buy drinks there. Not a bad deal considering the alternatives. She said to go clubbing she wanted short time money. 1500 baht. I told her to go jump. She stayed put but said she would not go with me. Fine. Stay there. I ordered my free drink.

It came. So did the bill. Another drink added. This place is losing it. Also during this time big boob b continued to ask if I would bar fine her and pay her short time for not going short time. I said no. She lost her chance. She left and went to pout in the corner. Nice boobs. Her loss.

Mamasan comes back and I tell her that I would like to pay my bill. She does not even offer to get me my real free drink or fix the bill. I pay the total minus the smokes and 1 drink. I think fair. She says if I don’t pay she will have the security guard come over. I said for what? To tell him u cheat the customers? I said forget the security guy. Call the police over so he gets the full story. She said no - that the security guy could handle. I said unless the security guy wants to offer me a free drink then he need not bother getting involved. I still was finishing my drink and continued to notice the service girl looking like she felt bad for how the mamasan was playing this out and noticed big boobs b still pouting in the corner. Nice boobs.

Drink finished I tipped the service girl directly and told her that I did not blame her for how bad the bar was run. Big Boob b pouted even more since she did not get a tip. Up to u for asking for too much. Mamasan even looked like she was mad for not getting a tip. I told her the only tip I was giving her was to look for a new job. Then I reminded them I was walking out without paying for the things on my bill I did not get and they better leave me alone. I said good bye and walked out. They left me alone.

Patpong sucks. Club Electric Blue sucks. Leave a manager in your bar at all times.
I won’t be back. Not for a long while.

back to recruiting…