The FARANG Speaks 2 Much

Hi folks. I had a friend in town this past week so was able to do quite
a bit of research in Nana, Soi Cowboy and even a little on 33. The pain
I go through for the Weekly

I also had the pleasure of meeting many of the US Military guys while
they were in town last week. Somehow word got out that Big Mango had a
great Burger and they kept flowing in. Great bunch of guys. The US
Military is getting a pretty bad rap these days, some deservedly so,
but when you meet these guys in person you get a different impression.

This week:

Bangkok Bar/Go-Go Update
After Hours Update
CSI
Tales From The Street
Big Mango Bar Update

Bangkok Bar/Go-Go Update
It’s low season in Bangkok or is it? Yes, it’s raining and it’s hot but that hasn’t stopped the visitors. The Go-Go’s have seen some low points during heavy rain nights but for the most part Soi Cowboy and Nana have been doing well. I don’t know about Patpong since I would rather give a thai girl 20000 baht to buy land in Isaan than visit that pit. Although, I did visit two After Hours clubs there this week, see the After Hours Update for more info. on that. Pattaya, maintained while the troops were here last week but has definitely dipped into low season.
NEP: (staying open til 2am, most nights anyway depending on the Police)
- Pretty Lady is back and with a vengeance. The girls with no drawers continue to be the most aggressive/friendly girls in the plaza. A veteran I know commented that he likes Pretty Lady because it was how the Go-Go’s were back in the day. It does have a strange and fun energy sometimes
- Playskool continues to be my top recommendation. Good talent and good fun
- Big surprise with Mandarin. Loads of talent, good music and friendly staff. Haven’t been in a while but good to see
- Rainbows are still the same but now offering Beerlao. Good to view but not pull
- Mercury was very disappointing
- Erotica VIP did redecorate but not sure it’s taking. Some nights they close the top floor which is kind of confusing, unless there is something else going on upstairs at that time. wink wink. They also have cut Ladyboy’s mixed in with the girls. They do tell you though which is which. Apparently many Japanese customers were requesting the LBs.
- Hollywood 3rd floor was devoid of talent on my visit
SC: (staying open later than 1am for the most part)
Some power outages this week. A quick one and a 20 minute one that I know of. Not great for business but somewhat fun when you have to feel your way around in the dark unless you run into the bouncer of course.
- 5 star was a first for me. I must admit that my reason for going to this bar was less than noble. A friend of mine said his ex-wife was working Service there and that she was gifted with two rather large milk producers. She was unfortunately taken for the night but there were a few nice girls in this little half Go-Go. The music was lame and loud and I hear it is worse when they have a live band there since it is so small. Worth a visit though if you like cozy Go-Go’s.
- Dejavu was horrible and has taken a dramatic slide in talent. No doubt it’s because of the militant mamasan. She really has no clue. Avoid this one imho.
- Spice Girls was a quick drink and out
- Jungle Jim’s and Cactus. I mention these two together because they were recommended to me by two Mango-goers. They share similar qualities. Small Go-Go’s where the girls are very friendly. Much touching basically. Jungle Jim’s didn’t have the prettiest lineup but they were all hands. I went too early to Cactus but saw some nice looking girls and heard that the girls are very friendly
- Dollhouse was a bit chaotic. Girls are running a muck and have attitude. One or two hotties but not like it used to be
- Suzie Wong’s was same as usual. I love how they put up the small girls in one lineup and then the bigger gals in the next shift change. Good Go-Go logic and good talent overall
- Black and White was pretty boring and talent was scarce
- Long Gun had a new very very very lame World Cup show. One girl would come up holding a soccer ball wearing a tank top, bikini bottom and a hat sporting some country’s flag. She would just dance holding the soccer ball for about a minute. Then she would leave and another girl came up and did the same. Then another two or three after that. Then they all came up together. All along the staff was screaming like teen girls back in the 60s seeing the Beatles for the first time, very contrived. Extremely unimaginative and very boring
Suk Soi 33:
I don’t normally go to 33 but wanted to show my friend a new area. I just don’t enjoy the scene. Isaan girls in cocktail dresses charging more than double the average bar fine.
- Office was packed with the expat and visitor yuppie crowd, about 80% guys in ties. The music was horrible and the talent there was lame. They do show all the sports though since I think they have the S. African satellite deal. Pool tables in the back are very low quality
- Livingstone’s. This was my first visit. Stickman wrote some positive things so I decided to check it out. Very cool. The place is huge and is also a boutique hotel. The bar is located in the back by the pool. It was a very fun visit. Music was lame but the girls and staff were very friendly. Not too hot but great attitude and the place had a good vibe. The next night they were holding a bikini pool party which sounded like a great time
Other:
- A new bar is opening above Foodland (take elevator to second floor) on Suk Soi 5. This will be a sports bar and they will be showing the World Cup games with English commentary
- We got the following news flash on our blog from the owner of Toxic:
TOXIC will have to close at midnight for the time being.
After midnight the TOXIC team will move to GROTTINO on Sukhumvit
Soi 19 (after robinson carpark, just before the family mart, take the small sub soi
to your left, where you will find GROTTINO about 50 meters on the left side).
GROTTINO will open all night.
European and Thai food will be available. Drinks, girls, freelancers. Fully airconditioned and homey, relaxed athmosphere.
Full coverage of the Football World Cup on big screen TV.
- Soi 7 Beer Garden finished their re-decorations. No second floor just a more airy first floor with new fans and some new TVs

After Hours Update
- We paid a first time visit to an After Hours club by Pratunam located by the Big C parking lot. The bar is called the Boss Bar and stays open all night. The entrance fee is 200 baht for all and you get a free drink with that. My drink tasted funny, like it was quickly cleaned in soapy water, so I didn’t drink it. As for the place, it was horrible. Packed with drunk farang, tired freelancers and rude thai men staff. Music was okay but a place to avoid for sure
- Soi Tunnel still maintaining as the top After Hours place
- Made a first time visit to two After Hours clubs in Patpong that both close at 3am. They are right next to each other in the heart of Patpong. One is named Twilo and is a hip-hop club. Very scary scene, trust me. The dance club next door though wasn’t too bad. More civilized crowd and some very cute freelancers. On the street by these bars were many freelancers as well, mostly LBs. Interesting to see this scene but don’t imagine I will be back unless the Nana/SC After Hours scene dries up

CSI
Have you ever felt like the crime scene on CSI? Well, I have. A recent girlfriend of mine being a top investigator. What was she investigating? The age-old "have you been with another lady?" question of course. I must say I was impressed with the depth of her skills and some of the times I didn’t realize until days later why she did some of the things she did. After a while I tuned in on her actions to better understand her skill level. It wasn’t paranoia since I never did cheat on her just curiosity. Below is a list of the techniques used. If you find this information useful than you are most likely cheating on your mate, just kidding
- Any new marks on your body? (she always joined me in the bathroom before I showered and I thought it was because she thought I was hot
- Mobile phone memory (calls made/received/missed, sms messages)
- Contents of wallet (money used, notes with phone numbers, business cards, receipts)
- Home Computer cache/memory (sites visited, e-mail’s if computer left logged in)
- Amount of Seed left in Condom (very gross but I was most impressed by this technique)
- Smell test when I came home (she was like a bloodhound)
- Visual test when I came home (was there any glitter or lipstick on my face or were my jeans and shirt wrinkled? did I shower recently?)
- Trash cans were always inspected
- If my mood changed a cross-examination was ordered
These are some of the things she went through and I loved her for it of course since she actually cared that much to bother but this was just at home mind you. She also had an external team of Investigators that would instantly contact home base if they saw me and it didn’t matter where I was. Fun stuff.

Tales From The Street
A rather amusing tale from a friend who probably gets more freebies than anyone in Bangkok. His latest strategy…meeting girls right outside of short-time hotels. They finish their romp in the hay and are chock full of baht and potentially feeling very frisky since the love making session was most likely focused on the customer. He turns on a little charm and off they go for the passion-filled freebie. Gross or Brilliant? You decide.

Big Mango Bar Update
- Beer Lao is kicking ass outselling many other favorites. We have our "Buy 6 Beerlao during a visit in June and get entered to win a Beerlao Lightbox" promotion and the testosterone has been taking over from there. Hats off to the three guys this past Saturday night that drank a whole case
- Kitchen Special this week: Sukiyaki with pork/chicken/beef/seafood
- World Cup 2006 Chart/Schedule is up. We will have the requisite tacky specials and promotions

-pmmp